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  1.  Money cannot buy happiness but it’s more comfortable to cry in a Mercedes than on a bicycle.
  2.  Forgive your enemy but remember the bastard’s name. 
  3.  Help someone when they are in trouble and they will remember you when they're in trouble again.
  4.  Many people are alive only because it’s illegal to shoot them. 
  5.  Alcohol does not solve any problems, but then neither does water
No doubt the first one is the first one :-)

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